Safety may be an issue in a changing relationship. If risk or danger exists, you need to use a tough “business” approach to protect the child. You need to step carefully, set firm boundaries and get help.

Don’t do this all alone. You must protect yourself as well as the children. Stick with the plan, no exceptions. Don’t take the bait. If possible, find ways to make your former partner feel appreciated, secure in their status as a parent, and valued for his or her strengths. Keep detailed records and screen calls. Avoid in person contact. Use email, voice mail or text messages.

To learn more about safety issues, read the PAS Handbook.

On the next page, there is a contact card which you should complete by typing the phone numbers of agencies that you could contact if you need help. Save the contact card you create and keep it in a convenient, secure location.