In that last video, children were shown a way to use “I” statements to communicate how they feel. As parents, you need to be open to hearing about your children’s feelings.

As you have just seen in the videos, it’s not easy for children to deal with a family break up. But with your guidance and support, they can learn to cope.

However, if your children’s experience is really troubled and they are having problems coping with the separation, you may need to seek professional help. Consider professional help:

• If your child’s distress and problems are constant and chronic.
• If your child’s symptoms get worse rather than better over time.
• If you feel unable to cope with your child.

 In summary:

• Separation is difficult for you and your children but how you respond is the main determining factor in how your children will adjust to the transition.
• Parents may have no choice in separating, but you do have a choice in how you respond to separation.
• If there is violence in the relationship, your first priority is to ensure your own safety and the safety of your children.
• Visit the Families Change and Changeville websites with your children to learn more about helping your children cope with separation.  Information on these websites is age-appropriate. The websites will help you and your children talk about what they are going through.